Attention Please
May 19th, 2009 by Marilyn
Where have I been?
Well, bat mitzvah weekend – not a ceremony, not a party, a weekend – blasts off in just ten days. I kept thinking it was longer; someone would say, “wow, just a month now,” and I’d wave them off, no no, much longer. Plenty of time. Then Josie would say “three weeks!” and I’d laugh. Come now, it’s not. Then, a few days ago, a friend said “getting close, huh? Under two weeks.”
I said holy mother of kugel, you’re right. And after I stopped nail-biting and rocking in the corner, I came out swinging – and this is where I’ve been:
Buying candy and snacks and granola bars for guest bags. Punching holes in guest bags.
Ribboning guest bags.
Spray-painting 45 cake boards silver. By the time it was over, I resembled the victim of a Bond villain. Also, it’s a good thing I’m done having kids, because I now require an iron lung.
Uh – making liqueurs.
That’s right – making liqueurs. Orange Spice, Blackberry, and Lemon. I read somewhere that in the old country – and I don’t mean Chicago – families made their own to serve at celebrations. This rang a warm little bell in my heart, and the other night, smashing blackberries, funneling vodka, it felt good – part haute, part Hasid, part hillbilly. The bottles are taking a nice dark nap before their debut. I’ll let you know if we go blind.
I have also been here…
…and here…
…and everywhere.
Josie’s busy preparing for her big show, but at twelve-almost-thirteen, you won’t be shocked to hear she has limited attention. What attention she does have is saved for friends, who are endlessly fascinating, rather than mom, who’s looking to paste place cards. She cuts, she glues, she snacks on chocolate, she leaves and comes back. A friend calls and she leaves again. If she faces me for five minutes and appears to be listening for two, I’m happy.
Where I have not been is blogging. I fret about that, and if Josie happens to pass during fretting, she’ll say “whatever, Mom. Just say you’ll see them after the 30th, when you’ll give them the biggest, best post ever.”
“Really,” I say, “and who’s going to write it, you?”
But she’s gone in a hair swing – handful of gummi bears, phone at her ear. It’s me and a book bag, dropped on the floor.
This bat mitzvah thing – it’s a celebration of growing up, or at least thinking about growing up. And past the candy and trimmings, dinners and brunches, it’s all about a girl who doesn’t have the time right now – but someday, I know, she will.
She might think of dad measuring cardboard for candy boxes, and handing pieces to mom, and mom cutting and folding and wrapping in paw paper, for god’s sake. She’ll roll eyes and remember, it was crazy. They were crazy. She might also remember that it all happened because she was there, and had a special something, and we told her so every day. By then it might make sense. Anyway, I like to think we’ve reserved a future moment – who wouldn’t want a gift-wrapped, stashed-away spark?
A girl so special she gets the glittery place card.
Who glued it? One of us who’s not on the phone, that’s who. But the other one, she of the rolling eyes and socks on the floor – thinking about growing up is hard. She deserves it.
Jean, spoiling that kid.
Hey! Throw the girl a bone!
Sorry…couldn’t resist. Home-made hooch? You are on a mission!
Love the Candy Boxes.
Great. Now I’m crying at work.
Yes, she’ll remember all of this, and with that longing we all have, wishing we knew then what we know now, that we could have stopped and basked in it more.
Yes, she’ll think her parents were crazy. The good crazy.
And yes, I am salivating over the thought of your homemade liqueurs. Now that’s a tradition to get behind.
good job! We all hope they will turn to us one day and give a hug, saying thanks, you did a great job!
I’m giddy about the whole event and can’t wait to hear more. When big events impending, we always create a calendar for my daughter, so she can count down the days. Five-year-olds love this business. Speaking of counting down, two more days of school with students and I’m free to pursue blogging full time.
I was going to ask for the lowdown on the homemade liqueurs, but with you being so busy I didn’t want to bother. I actually have a few books on making moonshine and such. I haven’t pursued this because my wife would frown upon such nonsense.
rock the casbah!
mike
Mazel Tov! And yes, she will remember it all…but she won’t fully appreciate it until she is grown. That is the beauty of parenting
. Congrats to you and yours, Mar!!
As always, love your camerawork.
HANG IN THERE! (and call this weekend if you need any help we might be able to provide)
We can’t wait!
It’s looking good, Marilyn. I hope you are enjoying yourself and all the planning. Hang in there!
Well, first, may I join the multitudes who are intrigued by the homemade liquor. It makes me want to run out and do it myself! Then I take to fanning myself and my senses return, because I could no more do that than make those beautiful desserts. But even this is not the important part. That part is the one about building Josie’s memory bank for the future. She’ll remember all the crazy stuff you did that had nothing to do with her–and then she’ll remember this. And she will smile. When she’s 30, 40, 50, and 60. Wow.
happy bat mitzvah weekend …to you,mother for being such a good one and to you daughter…who will follow in your footsteps,because she has had such a wonderful example.
Happy bat mitzvah weekend!
My Mom (from the “old country”) just takes some liquid juice concentrate (usually cranberry) and mixes it with vodka. Of course in the “old country” she had to do it the old way that required straining in the end but who could resist the conveniences of the modern life.
I finally subscribed to your blog, it takes only so many links from the Pitch for me to eventually click the button. Owen seems to be a big fan.
Lastly, Mazal Tov!
“Holy mother of kugel” is right! If it were me, I might need to taste test the liqueurs, oh, every hour or so, from now until then.
Sure wish I could be there… I’d bring a glittery place card just for you– you’re a sparkling example of crazy, lovely motherhood at its best.
When I come of age, I am having my party at your house.
grats to you both!
i came looking for a recipe and found the erev bat mitzvah postings. mazel tov and good luck. i will continue with my recipe search and you have a blast.
Oh, that is going to be one heckuva party! You girls are so creative!!! And Happy Blapday to JOSIE, what a beauty, looks a lot like her Mamma….is that bad to say? Josie your are lovely!
“part haute, part Hasid, part hillbilly” love that line