Seven Things You'd Rather Not See on a Food Blog

Jan 28th, 2009 by Marilyn

It’s not all glistening pools of jam and swirly frosting, you know. There are outtakes – trash heaps, a big ugly pile of things you don’t need to see on a food blog, starting with:

A naked, salted chicken. This might excite the foodie and the few, but I don’t want to know about it.
Rotting bananas.

My beat-up red Danskos, sitting in the bleachers at Josie’s volleyball game. Who needs that?

A naked turkey sprouting parsley. I defy you to photograph this tastefully.

For that biscuit, it’s the jaws of death.

How to wrap a bagel dog. Honestly, it seemed like a good idea at the time.

And the most important thing to not-see when reading a food blog?

Dishes. I mean, please. It’s not art – it’s just a mess.

Hold on – I think I found something sugared and tasty.

Ah – Apricot-Chocolate Chip Scones, dutifully sparkly and warm. I’m feeling better already!

Tags: photos, ugliness

Posted in Cleo, blogging, kitchen

44 Responses to “Seven Things You’d Rather Not See on a Food Blog”

on 28 Jan 2009 at 1:16 pm1Sandie

Hey, hey, hey…that bagel dog photo gives new meaning to the term food porn. What? Was I the only one thinking that?
on 28 Jan 2009 at 2:50 pm2brooklyn farmhouse

I think all of those pics look pretty good! Don’t know what that says about me, but I do! (maybe it’s more about your good photography!)
on 28 Jan 2009 at 2:57 pm3Renovation Therapy

You taunt that dog so much!!! LOL
on 28 Jan 2009 at 3:13 pm4Lydia (The Perfect Pantry)

Keep the red shoes (I’m a red shoe girl, too) — but yeah, there’s no elegant way to shoot raw poultry.
on 28 Jan 2009 at 4:04 pm5modernemama

Pornographic hotdogs, naked chickens and brown bananas! Must keep lunch down
on 28 Jan 2009 at 4:27 pm6Michelle

I know you have a thing for dogs, but….
on 28 Jan 2009 at 4:34 pm7Brindi (of food and fat)

I would have to agree that those pictures of raw chicken were a little much for me – nicely taken pictures, but raw chicken makes me gag. I do love the shoes!
on 28 Jan 2009 at 5:05 pm8natalie

i love this post! especially the pans!
on 28 Jan 2009 at 5:51 pm9Faith

So I would have to disagree with you on a couple of those. I personally love the pic of your red Danskos. I have a pair of my own that I wear 24/7. As well as the pic of Cleo and her cute little snout. Love it!

By the way, I have featured you on my blog sight today, and have given you an award for all your fabulousness! Please check out my blog to collect your award!
http://www.poppycockandsunshine.wordpress.com
on 28 Jan 2009 at 7:40 pm10Joyce

A cute post of behind the scenes, but a “sweet’ ending!
on 28 Jan 2009 at 7:51 pm11Shannan

Hey, nothing wrong with a good dose of reality! Not everything can be buttery and golden.
on 29 Jan 2009 at 10:59 am12Renovation Therapy

LOVE the new tart banner!!
on 29 Jan 2009 at 1:27 pm13Robin

made me laugh. But also made me wish I wasn’t reading it over lunch. (and that I had one of those scones)
on 29 Jan 2009 at 1:30 pm14Cathy

Ahhhh, Apricot Chocolate Chip Scones…my favorite!
on 29 Jan 2009 at 3:29 pm15Nella

I know exactly what you are talking about. I have such pictures. They are mostly of the brown/tan food groups. Cookie doughs, gravy, meats, browning hamburger (actually gray). I don’t have much luck photographing brown food………cept chocolate.
on 30 Jan 2009 at 1:39 am16pleasurepalate

This post made me chuckle! Thanks for the laughs.
on 30 Jan 2009 at 7:40 am17Candace

LOL! :::Golf Clapping:::

There are WAYYYY too many blogs with too many gratutitous food prep shots. My favorite are the ones that “share” 20 blurry pictures of every step of the process… How about 1 good image of the final product???? hmm?

However, there are a handful of blogs that document the entire cooking process very well… those are excluded from my rant.

PS… The pig-n-blanket image (although nicely photographed) sadly reminded me of my dog… when he’s excited. And that’s all I’m going to say about that.
on 30 Jan 2009 at 8:31 am18Karen

What a laugh! Amidst all the food blogs, it’s great to read something humorous and light-hearted! I think the pic of the bagel dog and the naked parsley-sprouting turkey said it all…umm…
on 30 Jan 2009 at 9:22 am19Chez Us

That is funny – good post!! Love those jaws of death!
on 30 Jan 2009 at 11:29 am20Ali

hah! I love it
on 30 Jan 2009 at 12:26 pm21Katie

That is funny! And I was going to take a picture of my bananas today – now I guess I won’t! lol
on 30 Jan 2009 at 12:35 pm22Cynthia

Is it weird that I like the poultry pictures?
on 30 Jan 2009 at 3:24 pm23Ginger

I needed a good laugh after a week of school being closed for my junior in high school!! I was ready to pull my hair out until I read this and chuckled!! Thanks for sharing….
on 30 Jan 2009 at 3:51 pm24Donna

Funny, funny, funny. I actually posted pics of black bananas on my site today, part of the theme:) Love your humor!
on 01 Feb 2009 at 3:01 pm25Kathleen

HAHAHA! Great post….I’m laughing cos well,
I posted this morning……

yeh.

I took your unspoken challenge, okay I made it a challenge and posted raw chicken.
on 02 Feb 2009 at 10:46 am26LOLfitness

The jaws of death picture is a wonderful composition though!
on 02 Feb 2009 at 2:41 pm27Kate

Haha. That was hilarious.
on 02 Feb 2009 at 4:09 pm28Kathleen

I got your email, wrote you back! still laughing!

will tackle the dirty dishes as art next, grinning cos I happen to be a fan of dirty dishes artfully done.

thanks for making my day! truly!
on 07 Feb 2009 at 2:15 pm29Eleonora

Your blog is super. So are your photographies. They make me hungry. I have spent a nice moment when seeing them. Thanks a lot.
on 09 Apr 2009 at 8:26 am30gina's weight watcher recipes

LOL!! Love this post : )
on 16 Apr 2009 at 1:52 am31Rachel

Hillarious! Love it! I defy you to tell me that my precariously stacked pile of dirty dishes isn’t an ever changing fine art installation!

Looks like a Jewish bagel dog.. *cough*

Thanks again for the laugh and I’ll trundle off and look at some of your recipes
on 18 Apr 2009 at 8:41 pm32zaza

i guarantee those bananas weren’t rotting. I’m from Brazil, so we definitely know alot about fruit… those bananas were at prime ripeness and maturity, i promise if you had peeled them, they would have been normal color and sweet, not tart like green, unripened bananas. As you can see, the tip of one was a perfect color… the tips are first to rot, so if the color on the tip isn’t off, its good and sweet.!
please keep this in mind, i really hope it helps, the outside is iffy, not the inside. i do this out of honest ‘wanting-to-help’ moment.
on 21 Apr 2009 at 3:46 pm33steven

That bagel dog thing is just presented wrong. A little more minimal dose of dog like a quarter slice with a bit of traditional dressing like relish and mustard would be great. Put a little avocoado in there and you could slice it up and call it new york style sushi.
on 23 Apr 2009 at 9:57 am34George@CulinaryTravels

I actually really like the doggie pick, it looks like an event that would actually happen, a kind of real life shot.

I’ve also taken quite a few pics of raw stuffed chicken and they’ve come out quite well (or at least I’ve been complimented on them) e.g. http://culinarytravelsofakitchengoddess.wordpress.com/2009/02/19/fusion-food/
on 25 May 2009 at 6:40 pm35Ninette

Thanks for a laugh. How true, how true.
on 04 Jun 2009 at 7:47 am36SweetKaroline

Hi! just found your blog through foodgawker and found myself laughing out loud at the picture of the “jaws of death” hahaha

Thanks:)
on 04 Jun 2009 at 5:29 pm37Memoria

What I don’t like to see on food blogs are pics of hairy animals juxtaposed to pictures of food or in the same pic. I don’t understand why so many bloggers insert a pic of a dog between pictures of chocolate cake or lasagne haha. I enjoyed this post.
on 04 Jun 2009 at 7:20 pm38Margaret Roach

When I worked (yes, I used to have a job) at Martha, one of the things that sent the very particular art directors ’round the bend were photos of nekkid poultry. Like the T’giving bird getting stuffed and such…not pretty. (Oh, wait, you have one of those here, too!). Always fights about running such photos in magazines. I think it’s all cinema verite!

Now as for rotting bananas, as you call them: You cannot bake my morning muffins (whole wheat, banana, millet, agave) without rotting bananas. And I eat these muffins daily. So can we say “deliciously ripe” instead of “rotting” please?
on 02 Jul 2009 at 12:34 am39rinaz

There must be something wrong with me, I dont see anything wrong with any of the pictures
on 05 Jul 2009 at 8:25 am40Julie Leshtz Paritsky

Hey Marilyn,
Haven’t talked to you in about 25 years. What’cha been doin’?
on 08 Jul 2009 at 6:22 am41Fuji Mama

Such a funny post!
on 08 Jul 2009 at 10:42 am42Sylvia

Oh my God!! I can’t stop to laugh. Stuffed naked chicken is hilarious
The post was so funny. Thanks! You made my day
on 01 Sep 2009 at 12:39 am43Jamie

LOL Great brilliant post! Actually I love the jaws of death! We have some too and it always warms my heart and makes me laugh. I do move that first close up of the nekkid salted chicken. Too funny. But, then again, I’m a foodie. Just don’t let me see that girl with her head on. Bagel dog is questionable but those are not the rotting bananas I often find lying in a puddle of gunk, surrounded by gnats, that I usually find in my house.

Wonderful! And love those scones. Yummy pretty!
on 13 Oct 2009 at 6:06 am44Neely

I have just started my food blog and will remember these tips always! I might just print and tape to my cabinets just in case I forget next time I am snapping away in the kitchen. Thanks!