My Big Fat 90’s Wedding Cake
Nov 13th, 2008 by Marilyn
On our 15th anniversary, a look back at the most important cake I never made.
———–
We’d insisted on a November wedding – autumn, crisp and comfortable – but now, standing in satin heels before a seated crowd at the Knickerbocker Hotel, I thought, what the hell does it matter what month it is, except that I’m wearing long sleeves? We are inside.
That was my view in 1993, but this long day had actually begun in 1985, when my parents drove away from the dorm and I carefully stood my mixtapes in a red plastic crate. Greg and I became friends that day, and found push me-pull you love after that, fueled by talk and turntables and parties, sunrises and vodka and dancing – sloppy dancing, no thoughts of time, money, or aching feet.
Even now – mortgage, silverware, thank-you notes - we still floated on a hazy and curious feeling of promise, still carried the remnants of a beer-soaked dance floor, and they would remain our guide on this day, when one “I do” minute might make the world briefly irony-free.
Or “I will,” or whatever – seconds later I thought, isn’t dinner going to be in this room? Thirty rows of family down there would be whisked away into cocktails, and return here for dinner. Would the room be ready? Would there be enough ice? Could I get a snack?
The staff would in fact transform the space - currently holding one bride, one groom, a rose-covered chuppah, a photographer, a video guy, a Rabbi and two hundred guests - back to a regular ballroom in time for soup. The grand old 1920’s girl, with her gilded ceilings and lighted dance floor, had seen both Al Capone and my parent’s prom night.
They knew what they were doing. By the first toast, draped tables and clinking china hugged the smoky mirrored walls. In the center, the dance floor built for Capone was lit for our newly married entrance, and at the other end of the ballroom, calling me, was our cake.
As an overeager apprentice pastry chef, I’d planned to make my own wedding cake. I fought everyone’s warnings, including chatty taxi drivers - don’t even think about it, baby – up to the last minute. Consumed by important tasks like hot-gluing 400 tiny peach satin roses to 200 place cards, I finally admitted defeat, and though it killed me to do it, I reluctantly turned the job over to a well-known European bakery.
And now the haughty not-my-cake taunted me from across the ballroom. During the reception I’d sneak peeks at it, and hug guests on that side of the room to get closer, edging across the floor; finally, my train rustled against the table’s skirting, and there it was.
We eyed each other. That cake was wearing nothing but an ivory buttercream robe and a wholly indecent – no, completely insane - shower of white chocolate curls.
I pursed my over-lipsticked lips. Really, it’s over the top. Kinda gauche, a bit much. Surely it could have used a more restrained hand, you know, say, mine, and then…the damn thing winked at me. Winked like Alexis Carrington in four tiers and frosted shoulder pads. Dark chocolate perfume and white ruffled lashes. I kid you not, the sly thing smiled.
I stifled the impulse to laugh – I’m nuts, I thought, I’m married and freaking nuts – but out came a giggle, then a chuckle, and a full-on, doubled-over, can’t-talk guffaw. Aunt Ruth, Aunt Margaret, Aunt Rose - all the aunts watching the bride clutching her princess-waist, teary and gasping, likely whispered “dear batty little thing…she’s overcome.” And I was.
Overcome with all this more, all this larger-than-life more that was suddenly now. I stared at the cake thinking this is it. This is me and I’ll be cranking out many happy endings like this one – big, moussed, and circa ‘85 - and each time I do I’ll think of us, sharing endless runs for cheap, hot doughnuts in the dark.
Now we fed each other chocolate cake from forks in the air, white chocolate curls falling off our lips like rose petals, laughing and laughing at this hilarious circus, laughs you belt out once or twice in life and never see again - all the while cameras clicking and crumbs dropping. Our private delicious laughter, and one sound moment for a sweet life ahead.
Happy 15th Anniversary! Congratulations. Your cake looks divine (and I’m sure it tastes much better than that wedding cake)!
Happy Anniversary!! That cake looks really yummy.
Happy Anniversary! This post was so incredibly sweet, perhaps sweeter than that cake
Thank you for sharing!
Carol: thanks. The wedding cake actually tasted pretty good - I think - but selfish baker pride always gets the best of me.
Jayne: thanks! It’s like eating a large block of white chocolate. All at once.
Erin: aw, thanks. I believe “saccharine” is the word, but such is life. You only get married once - mostly once - right?
Another great story. Your birthday camera on your anniversary cake is…….. well beautiful.
Hi Marilyn!
Congratulations and have a happy 15th anniversary and more and more years to come
Your cake looks fabulous like your life-story…and the white swirls enhance this yummy cake!
Happy Anniversary…and that cake…oh!
you just can’t go wrong with a mountain of callebaut chocolate swirls, can you?
Wow! so romantic.i love this part “Our private delicious laughter, and one sound moment for a sweet life ahead.”
Happy Anniversary. This is a triple A post. Love the Carrington reference. Now…umm…please pass a (big) piece…
That is an excellent way to celebrate your anniversary. Now how the heck am I gonna craft a croqembouche for mine?
Jenni: thank you. Birthday * and * anniversary camera!
Gera: thanks so much - nothing like a heap of white chocolate, eh?
Theresa: there are no calories on celebration days. I think.
Modernemama (Jane): I love Callebaut! It just melts on the tongue.
weddingsetc: welcome and thank you.
Jean: who doesn’t love Alexis? (Blake, too - but Krystle was a bore)
Heather: hi there. Croquembouche? That’s a challenge - and so beautiful - but I can send a small one over if you like.
I really need to add that chocolate to my grocery list…
Happy anniversary! Thanks for sharing such a great story.
We took a whirlwind trip to K.C. last week, and I thought of you when we were there. The weather was perfect, and Ted kept laughing at me because I was in awe of all the red-leafed trees. Fall in Evanston, as you may remember, tends toward hues of orange and yellow and russet. I’d never seen so much autumn red before.
That “hazy and curious feeling of promise” that each of us experience on our wedding days is so delicious to remember! I love the fact that your wedding cake cracked you up, and that you made a triumphantly big and 80’s-moussed cake in commemoration of that day (thinking all the while of doughnuts
Happy anniversary, and may I please have a large slice of that cake!
What an amazing writer your are. I was completey spell-bound by your prose! A delightful cake as well. Have many more happy years!
very pretty!
I remember that wonderful day, many more Happy Anniversaries. We love you both.
I’m with RobinSue. Your writing waltzes and mambos with grace. It’s a piece of writing I’ll revisit.
My wife and I also had a November wedding. I guess, I need to start thinking about how we’ll celebrate our anniversary.
Happy 15th anniversary!! You had one of the most beautiful weddings I’ve ever been to (and you were a gorgeous bride - you should post a picture or two!). Great band, too.
I loved that lit-up dance floor, but had no clue it was built for Capone - cool and bizarre! Or that your parents had their prom there.
Your wedding is where I was introduced to the concept of the dessert table. Mmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Jean: a large block of Callebaut is handy for snacking. Not that I would know.
Joanne: I saw that you were in KC! The colors have been beautiful this year.
Sarah: here’s a big virtual slice. Enjoy!
RobinSue: how kind! Thanks for your good wishes.
suesse-mahlzeit: welcome, and thank you.
MAN: I remember you high up on a chair, holding on for life!
muddywaters (Mike): start practicing your chocolate skills; never fails for anniversary joy.
Robin: that dessert table was rather large, and sweet but unecessary! Your own wedding was a blast, too, and you looked lovely, and I recall that my hair stayed pleasingly straight. What a night!
happy anniversary!! beautiful words paired with a beautiful cake–this post was a pleasure to read.
Wow, you tell a pretty great story and make a very pretty cake. The photos are beautiful too. Thanks for sharing your anniversary with us.
Happy anniversary! I just teared reading your post!
Have a great day!
This cake is absolutely stunning.
Isn’t it amazing all the things a bride worries about. Especially on her wedding day. I always tell brides-to-be and the mothers…”Two things matter - the bride and groom both show up, and no one dies. Everything else is refundable details.”
Happy anniversary!
Wow…what a great wedding cake and Happy Anniversary! I love the white chocolate shavings on top, must have taken you such a long time and great attention to detail.
Makes me want to grab a fork and help you eat it. Yum!
Happy Anniversary! I wish I would have known you then…..
Beautiful cake!
Happy belated anniversary!
I made sugared pansies for my wedding cake, and that just about killed me. I can’t believe you contemplated making your own.
I think all the shavings are beautiful!
Oh gosh, what a great post. Thanks for sharing.
And happy, happy anniversary.
+Jessie
a.k.a. The Hungry Mouse
Congratulations! Sounds like such an incredible wedding cake you had.
Grace: good cakes bring out good things! Thanks and take care.
Karen: it was a pretty good day. Do you have a cake story, too?
Allisha: thanks. I get teary looking at all that chocolate!
Amber: refundable details is right! So funny.
Timothy: welcome, and thanks. You grab that fork, there’s plenty.
PVS (Pam): thanks. Me too.
Amy H: sugared pansies - quite an undertaking! I’m sure it was lovely.
Jessie: glad to share good things. Thanks!
Kian: it was quite a cake, and quite a circus. A good day.
The cake is gorgeous! Thanks for sharing, what a sweet and funny story. Happy Anniversary and here’s to many more.
The Callebaut is so appropriate for such a momentous occasion, and what a masterpiece you created with it!
Reeni: welcome, and thank you! Lots more cakes to share ahead.
Global Patriot: hello, and you’re right - as noted above, you can never, ever go wrong with a heap of Callebaut.
Excellent post and beautiful cake. Congratulations!!
Happy Anniversary Marilyn and Greg! You guys had a beautiful and FUN wedding! I remember the food was awesome! The band was incredible and you looked beautiful and so happy!
Delicious cake!! What a sweet and funny story like your gorgeous cake. I love it.
NCFoodie: welcome, and thanks. I offer you a virtual slice!
Cathy: ah, yes, I remember it well…the bridesmaid dress, you nearly fainting off the stage, and yep, that band. Quite a night.
Jasen: hello, and thanks. It’s easy to sway people with white chocolate, that’s for sure.
Of all the weddings I’ve been to, yours is still the one I have the fondest memories of. Nice post.